ext_6260 ([identity profile] ishtar79.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] ishtar79 2008-12-21 02:30 am (UTC)

I've been going through such a roller coaster of emotions since this started; crying, getting angry, getting cynically detached and then getting angry all over again.

I don't really have anybody to go to the protests with (going by myself: deeply unwise), so much of my frustration is directed at myself, for not being able to do anything more productive than curse at uploaded youtube videos of police violence (these are not even the worse images I've seen these days-I saw footage of five cops 'subduing' a student by beating on him while he was down, stepping on his neck).

And don't worry, I am safe. I was out in the most popular shopping street the other day-it was surreal. A couple of hundred meters from where the worst clashes occurred, and all the shops where opened, people were shopping, carols were fucking playing. Consumerism prevails always, it seems.

I do want to go to the site where the boy was shot and light a candle. I wanted to the other day, but I realised I didn't have my ID on me, and didn't want to get stopped by the cops for a check without documents (the fact I look younger than my age? Works AGAINST me right now). And how ridiculous is this, to worry about going in a place near where I normally go out every Saturday without my papers, like I live in a totalitarian state or something.

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